Who Says You’re Not Perfect?

Misty Gatlin Fitch

Who says you’re not perfect?
Who says you’re not worth it?
Who says you’re the only one that’s hurting.
Trust me.
That’s the price of beauty.  Who says you’re not pretty?  Who says you’re not beautiful?*

Every time I hear it on the radio, this song causes me to stop and listen.  What are your thoughts when you stop and really listen to these words?  Before going on, listen to the video below and take the song in as if it’s about you.

This song reminds me so much of my book, The Real You, because the entire premise is about the way God views us versus the way the world does.

I’m no beauty queen.  I’m just beautiful me.

Amen and Praise God!  I fully accept this statement for myself!  According to Merriam-Webster online, the definition of beauty queen is: a beautiful and glamorous woman or girl;

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I Was Made by God, and I’m Beautiful!

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There are no real words to explain what it’s like driving my kids to school in the mornings.  Of course, sometimes it’s a blur of rushing, blonde hair flying as we quickly get to the car, and words of frustration coming from the oldest. . . well, to be honest, those words are coming from all of us during those days.  It’s not until I stop focusing on the time once we’re in the car that moments like this morning are able to happen.  I need to make a mental note of this realization because, after all, regardless of what the clock says once we’re in the car, there’s nothing that will get them to school or me to work any quicker.

Most people want to live right beside their kids’ schools because it’s more convenient.  We don’t live even in the same town as the school our kids attend, so we have a fairly decent drive.  Car rides with my kids, though, are so precious to me.  There’s no tv, no dinner to be cooked, no laundry to be folded, no dishes to be loaded.  There’s nothing but driving.  I have found that the best, most relevant conversations with my kids come during these times.  Today was no exception.

From nowhere my daughter said, “Psalm 139:14 – I will praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made.” 

We have said this scripture to her from birth.  It’s actually the very first memory verse both she and her brother learned during the first week of school.  It’s what I call my “theme verse.”  It’s the name of my ministry.  This scripture is a part of our lives.

For the first time I realized we have never really talked about that verse.  I’ve made sure the kids know it by heart, but I started thinking and had to ask her, “That’s wonderful.  Now, do you know what it means to be fearfully and wonderfully made?”

She responded, “Yes.  It means God made me, and I’m beautiful.”

Her brother’s response was, “I was made from Jesus, and I’m cool and compassionate.”

After I told them they were both right, I asked if they wanted to know more about what that means, and my daughter immediately said, “Yes.”

God completely picked it up from there giving me words that were perfect for the two of them because it was something they were able to relate to and understand.

Cake Boss

I have made and decorated cakes for several years now.  I’m by no means exceptional at it – or experienced and educated enough to be called a professional, for that matter.  The majority of my knowledge actually came from watching The Cake Boss, but I’ve ended up with some pretty cool cakes if I do say so myself.  The kids have seen each phase of the cake process, so they understood this explanation.  We were all fearfully and wonderfully made by the Creator of the Universe.  It’s very similar to when a cake is made and decorated by its creator. 

I can’t just start on a cake without knowing where I’m going.  Who is the cake for?  What is the occasion?  How Many people will be eating the cake?  What is the theme of the event?  These questions all have to be answered before I can even think about the design of the cake.   I have to know the exact purpose of the cake.

Once all of these questions are answered, I can start designing on paper.  Once I perfect the design, it’s time to bake the cake.  The ingredients are important.  In order to get the amount necessary to feed everyone at the event, and in order for it to taste great, I have to measure and place specific ingredients in.  If the purpose of the cake is to be chocolate, then I will need to put the ingredients in it to make it a chocolate cake.  Sounds pretty common sense, right? 

My favorite part comes after the cake is made.  This is when I get to work with the fondant and make my 2-dimensional design come to 3-dimensional life!  If you’re unsure what fondant is, it’s a sugary icing that’s pliable and moldable like play dough, and it can harden like clay.  When I start, the fondant is just in containers separated by colors.  It’s like big “globs” of play dough.  I have to gather up the right amount of each color I need and start working.  I can’t just sit back and expect the fondant to come together; I have to get in there and work.  It’s a carefully thought out process, too.  Some things need to be started before other things because maybe they need time to harden.  Certain pieces need to be placed on the cake before other pieces in order for it to become the work of art it was intended to be.

I sometimes use tools when working with fondant, but I always use my hands.  I spend a great amount of time and care on this part.  Whether I’m making letters to spell out someone’s name or sculpting a Hulk hand out of Rice Krispy Treats before covering with fondant and painting it to give extra depth, I place a lot of focus on every intricate detail.  Most importantly, the entire time I’m working, I have the end product in mind.

Ready to Be Served

God paid even more attention when making you.  He had the end product in mind.  He designed you to serve a purpose, and he made sure you were equipped with all the right ingredients you would need in order to become that final product he intended you to be.  Every intricate detail inside of you was well thought out, and God took special care in giving you the qualities and talents he gave you because he knew they would be necessary in the future. 

Then, he focused on the outer design: your hair, your nose, your ears, your eyes, etc.  Every part of your being was planned by him.  You were not just thrown together.  You were fearfully and wonderfully made, and every party of your design is absolutely perfect. 

Remember that before putting yourself down when you somehow feel like you don’t compare to the person next to you.  Don’t compare.  You are two different people.  The person next to you was fearfully and wonderfully made in a way that helps them serve their purpose.  Your purpose is different, and you were made in a way that helps you fulfill your specific purpose.  God didn’t create us to compare.  He created us to use our design to work alongside the design of someone else to make something powerful.

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Another cake post: Beautiful in its Time

Want to see some of my cakes?  Check out these links:  Cakes   ~    Party Themes

Your Child on Display – What if the Tables Were Turned?

As someone who always struggled with insecurities, I decided from even before Day 1 that disciplining my children would be done in private.  With 2 kids I try my best to correct them separately from one another.  Do I follow through with that philosophy 100% of the time?  Absolutely not.  I fail just like anyone else and correct my kids in front of one another and every so often in front of someone else – usually because I’m so rushed, and I don’t stop to remind myself that they are more important than whatever I’m  rushing to do.

However, I do not humiliate them.  Humiliation is not at any time an appropriate way to correct behavior– most especially in front of others.  I believe correcting them in front of their siblings is somewhat humiliating, but to discipline a child in front of his or her peers can prove detrimental and cause a vast array of insecurities.

Of course, this is my way of thinking, and I would not push my beliefs on any other parent.  Having said that, though,  I feel so uncomfortable when I’m in a room where a parent is getting on to their child.  It makes me feel as though I’m forced to be in a room where a completely inappropriate movie is being shown, and I can’t get out.  I can choose not to watch, but I still hear it.  The child knows I’m there, and I know I’m in a place where I shouldn’t be.  It’s humiliating to the child, and then the child becomes insecure with me (or whoever witnesses the correction).

The post below is wonderful.  I see these Atta Boy pictures on my newsfeed all the time, and I never know what to think about them.  Sharing them, for me, is out of the question.  Each time I see one I pray it’s a fake.  I can’t imagine the insecurities that occur when children (and yes that includes teenagers) are humiliated so openly and publicly. 

On that note, please consider the things you post on your own newsfeed about something “funny” your baby, school age child, or teenager did.  Is it necessary to post?  Is it something that would humiliate you if you were the one doing the “funny” thing?  I’m not excused from this.  As much as I try to post only the positive things about my children, I am almost certain I’ve posted something that would be embarrassing, and I’ve probably done it more than once.  I urge you to ask yourself before posting something about your children: Would this be okay to post this very same thing if he or she did/said this at 5, 10, 15, 20, 30, 50 years old?  Then, ask yourself if you would be willing to post the exact same update if you were the subject. 

The naked baby pictures are so cute to a mom and dad, but is that really appropriate for your social networking friends?  I’ll tell you I won’t even allow that in my baby books.  People laugh because the few pictures I have of my kids with certain unclothed body parts all have stickers covering them.  I don’t want my children at any age to be on display like that, which is why I wouldn’t even consider posting a picture of the ultrasound photo that says It’s a boy/girl with the arrow or circle pointing out how that was determined, nor would I change my babies’ diapers in a room of friends or family or strangers.  It was a personal decision for me, and I wouldn’t do it any differently now as I did then.  Some things should be kept private in my opinion.

****I promise the following post isn’t quite as “preachy” as mine might be, so go ahead and check it out.  It really is a very good post.

 Destroying Your Child’s Heart — One FB Picture at a Time by Heidi Stone